


you were there, you were tearing up everything

by breakable_fix



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Gen, Spoilers for s02e08 Spacewalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-18
Updated: 2014-12-18
Packaged: 2018-03-02 00:58:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2793950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breakable_fix/pseuds/breakable_fix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'she feels her stomach turn over, feels her heart kickstart and then she is running, her legs pumping; burning feeling back into the rest of her body. she crashes through the tall grass and then its only ten feet separating her from home, from safety. (safety? there is no safety from this)'</p><p>clarke, raven, and bellamy react to the events of s02e08</p>
            </blockquote>





	you were there, you were tearing up everything

**Author's Note:**

> so, hey this is the first fic i've ever published and its disgustingly full of commas and run-on sentences haha. read accordingly. 
> 
> title from the Mikky Ekko song We Must Be Killers

she isn’t… she isn’t sure she is alive. she can feel the blade in her hand and the blood, _(warm. tacky)_ on her fingers. she can feel her heart beating, forcing hot, heavy blood through her numb body. but she couldn’t… she can’t be here in this moment. this is not… she feels her hands start to shake, her legs tremble. she has to go… has to.. they’ll kill her if she. the commander shouts something she doesn't hear. her eyes cast over.. over  _(he looks so young)_ and she feels her stomach turn over, feels her heart kick-start and then she is running, legs pumping; burning feeling back into the rest of her body. she crashes through the tall grass and then its only ten feet separating her from home, from safety. _(safety? there is no safety from this)._

-

she knows before it happens, can tell what clarke’s doing from her determined stride, from the blood and pain and love that binds her to these two. she can’t hate clarke for it. she never hated finn for anything. and so she stills and steels herself for impact, ready for her world to explode. but when it happens, when she sees his body slump over, sees clarke step away, swaying in the distance, she doesnt hurt. she just... floats, feeling a million miles away from everyone, like she’s back in zero-g somehow and it peaceful until she realizes that someone is screaming ‘no. no. no.' it takes her what feels like an entire year to realize that its her. and its funny, because she never thought she could make a sound so horrible. she sees the ground rushing up to meet her, feels the cold, hard Earth against her palms. she wants to dig it all up and build a tower off of this godforsaken planet, back to her beloved stars again. and then someones arms are around her, pulling her back up. and someone’s mouth is in her hair, repeating ‘its ok. its ok.’ but its not. and it never will be.

-

he is terrified watching her move through the grounder camp, watching her step right up against indra’s spear. time seems to slow while she is there, just across the fence, but so far away. he might as well be on the ark again, unable to move, unable to fight. he thinks he might be shaking, from fear or adrenaline or some sickly mixture of the two. as she moves away from the commander, stepping closer to finn he thinks he knows what this is. he can almost feel clarke’s horrible, crippling remorse, can almost hear her the unspoken apology. he watches them embrace, watches as she draws the life from him, so sweetly, so gently, and he knows its sick but he can’t think of any better way to die. but then raven is falling and he is catching her, holding her up against him, trying to pick up the pieces. his last thought before all hell breaks loose is _nothing will ever be the same_.


End file.
